Let me relate to you my recent online dating experience. As you may know, I am currently single and looking for a relationship with an extraordinary man. Because I am dating, I can understand what my single clients go through better than if I’d be happily married for decades! I thought it was time to join an online dating site so I could meet some new men and find out what it’s like to put myself out there like that.
About two weeks ago I decided to join Match. The good news is that I had some interest. The bad news is that things didn’t go very well. One fellow who was proud to claim that he is trustworthy didn’t call when he said he would and when I expressed my concern about it, I never heard from him again. Another one actually did call, but at 6am my time. He missed me, so he emailed me to ask when the best time would be to reach me and I suggested between 8am and 9pm my time. He called even earlier the next day at 5:30 am! And another one suggested we spend some time Instant Messaging. I know that this can be a huge time waster (and he lives in a different part of the country so I don’t know that we’ll ever actually meet) so I said I’m not into IM-ing but I’d be open to a phone call and if he gave me his number I’d phone him. His response? To send me a detailed email about how to sign up for Messenger!
Hello! Is anybody listening?
So far, my online dating experience hasn’t been very positive and I’ll stick it out until my 3-month subscription is done. I know people who are now married who met via online dating so it does work for some people. For me… it’s about being clear on my boundaries (no early phone calls, no IM-ing, no endless emails!) and getting out and doing more local things. I’m actually hosting “dinner, drinks and dancing” in my neighbourhood tonight for singles. Do you want to meet more local singles? Perhaps you can start a Meetup group – or offer to host an event for an existing Meetup. There is definitely something to be said for meeting face-t0-face in a group doing an activity you enjoy.
Online dating is one strategy for meeting other singles but, for me so far it’s taken up a lot of time and I don’t have much to show for it – except some funny stories!
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